"When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.”
"Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps."
"I was walking down Fifth Avenue today and I found a wallet, and I was gonna keep it, rather than return it, but I thought: well, if I lost a hundred and fifty dollars, how would I feel? And I realized I would want to be taught a lesson.”--
It's good to laugh, sometimes especially at serious concerns.
Emo Phillips is a comedian with a somewhat odd delivery style and geeky appearance. He has a web site. His biography is at Wikipedia. I found the quotes at think.exist.com though.
Have a great day, everybody!